EUW SELF LOVE CAMPAIGN - COMPARISON AND ENVY

COMPARISON AND ENVY 

HEY LOVELIES, 

Although this part of the campaign is to do with comparison and envy, want to rely heavily on comparison. Comparison can be defined as a likening or something or someone that you want to have or be like. Comparing someones ways to the way you are. Not being content with who you are, so then going by what you see others doing and having and wanting to be like that, whilst comparing what you can do, to be like them. 

Comparison I always say is soo toxic and makes you want to be who you dont understand, but just based on what you see. In James 4 it speaks of jealousy, which when linked here one can say that you get jealous of another and then compare what they have to what you have and go as far as questioning yourself.

JAMES 4:1-3 'What is causing the quarrels and fights amongst you? Dont they come from evil desires at war within you? You want what you dont have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you cant get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them.' CHECK YOUR HEART!!!!!!

Look at how the bible speaks about jealousy it shows you how toxic such ways can be and if not corrected can drive people to the extreme. Putting others and themselves in danger. I for one used to be hot on comparing to others. Whether it was our achievements, our relationships, hair, skin. You see social media if you are not disciplined and content within, you will be swayed by comparison left right and centre. Simply because you do not see or have an idea of what those people go through. People show you what they want you to see at the click of a button. And what is sad is that some make you feel beneath them, simply because their current season is good, but just as seasons change, our seasons too in our lives wont always be easy or great. 

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We need to remember that as believers life wont always be rosy as others seem to keep selling this lie. Yes there will be good days and bad days too but that shouldn't make you be content in comparing to others. Your level 1 may be someones level 5 so be very careful when you compare to what you have no complete understanding on. 

I for one used to compare a lot because what I saw was not what I had or was enjoying. I would be in tough seasons and look at people on social media and begin to compare and question why things are the way they are for me, but always good for them. But God made me understand the danger of comparison not just that, but also asked a Q would I want to take on their sacrifices, or their trials and tribulations? From then on I began to become more content with my portion and what He had called me to do. 

Dont let comparison rob you of your peace and joy, no two people are the same, neither do they do the same things, like the same things, look the same etc. As I always remind myself God is a God of diversity and originals, not counterfeits and copies. When you know this you will give God thanks always and not envy or compare to what you see out there. You dont know what others are doing to get what they have. So learn to focus on your path and do not be misled by emotions. 

 

TIPS TO OVERCOME COMPARISON AND ENVY -

- BE OPEN AND HONEST TO YOURSELF ABOUT YOUR STRUGGLE 

- PRAY OVER IT AND LET GOD WORK ON YOU 

-UNDERSTAND WHAT GOD HAS CALLED YOU TO DO 

-LEARN TO BE CONTENT IN WHO YOU ARE 

- STUDY THE WORD ON THIS AREA

 

GOD BLESS YOU ALL 

LISABLESSED 

 

EUW SELF LOVE CAMPAIGN - REJECTION

REJECTION 

Hey lovelies,

Rejection can be defined as the act of pushing someone away. You may experience rejection from family of origin, a friend, or a romantic partner, and the resulting emotions can often be painful. Rejection might be experienced on a large scale or in small ways in everyday life. While rejection is typically a part of life, some types of rejection may be more difficult to cope with than others.’

If there is any area I know too well it is rejection, rejection from friends and in relationhips. When rejection took place I never knew how to handle it, I lost myself in the negativity and pain of others, I would think I was not good enough based off of the treatment I received from others. But later on when I let God in, I realised and learnt that I cannot control the actions of others, neither can I change people and definately cant expect them to treat me good based on me treating them good. 

On one occasssion I faced rejection which really took a lot out of me, was when I was cheated on countless times and dumped, faced many things, put to the side and then asked to be the side chick. Because I did not know myself worth, I allowed a lot which should have avoided, walked away from and prayed over. But being that I was naive and weaker in my walk back then a lot of what I experienced at times was self inflicted because what I was entertaining was what God would have saved me from. But thanks be to God and His grace and mercy for delivering me and setting me free from all that I endured.

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You have to be very careful to not let imperfect people who are not sure of themselves define and put you down you have to come to an understanding of who you are and whose you are. Or else you will allow many things to stagnate you in mess.

When rejected and you question yourself, you entertain a low sense of self, you lose yourself, you dont know your identity, you water down your capabilities and on top of that you accept lower than you deserve because you always use the yardstick of man to move by and so by doing that, you cannot progress to do and be better. You will forever be bound to the toxic thoughts of men and their ways. But the moment you break out and break free and use Christ as your standard you will surpass all the negativity and traps and be in the positon where God wants you to be and that alone is all that matters.

God loves us, He calls us His own, we are cherished, beautiful, a royal priesthood and able to do great and mighty things once we believe this and know who we are. Step out and be bold you may be rejected by man, but not by God.

REJECTION IS ALWAYS A REDIRECTION TO WHAT GOD HAS IN STORE FOR YOU. NEVER SEE IT AS A BAD THING, THOUGH EASIER SAID THAN DONE. DONT LET IT  KEEP YOU DOWN. BUT RATHER RISE UP AND GIVE ALL TO GOD, LET HIM USE THE PIECES TO MAKE A BEAUTIFUL MASTERPIECE.

REJECTION ENCOURAGEMENT BOOSTERS-

- TAKE WHAT YOU ARE STRUGGLING WITH TO GOD - BUILD INTIMACY WITH GOD

- PRAY OVER THE REJECTION AND HURT

- STUDY THE WORD AND USE THE TRUTH TO ENCOURAGE YOU

- GET ACCOUNTABILITY IN A GODLY COMMUNITY

- GET INTO A SOUND DOCTRINE CHURCH

Be encouraged and know that your past doesnt define you, it rather teaches you and helps to build you up to learn, grow and be positioned to where God wants to allign you to operate from. I pray this blessed and encouraged you in some way. Loving you in prayer.

God richly bless you all

LisaBlessed

EUW SELF LOVE CAMPAIGN - LOW SELF ESTEEM

LOW SELF-ESTEEM

Hey lovelies,

Self-Esteem can be defined as the opinion of how we see ourselves, so when we have a healthy self-esteem, we tend to feel positive about ourselves and about life in general. But when our self-esteem is low, we tend to see ourselves and our life in a more negative and critical light.’

Today want to tackle briefly the sensitive area of self-esteem, I for one can relate to this area for many reasons, one being the labels that were enforced on me growing up and in my teenage years. I struggled with identity, not really knowing who I was, I would allow so much to enter my mind and let it stay there as I lived it out so my view on self and live was tainted and very damaging. When you don’t know who you are you allow anyone who has no right to define you, label you and have control over what you say to yourself and how you treat yourself.

That is why it is so so important to know whose you are and who you are because then that alone is the power you carry against any negativity and critics. Yes, people will always have something to say, but those same imperfect people have different mindsets, different opinions, different likes and dislikes so anything they say about you wont always be the same as the next person.

So, imagine trying to people please all these people, living by what they tell you.. Damaging right? Well that was me for some time, because I was lost, I had no direction, no wisdom or sense of belonging and always tried to fit in with what people wanted me to be and most times because they didn’t know themselves they tried to put that on me. It was like the lost leading the lost, the blind leading the blind. It was never going to end well unless someone broke out of it and got better for themselves. Thank God for saving me, I write this saved and being that I was unsaved before, I knew no better.

Notice the definition of self-esteem says its how we see ourselves, so if we see ourselves low, we then give permission for others to see us in the same way we too see ourselves and that can be very damaging, because in a place where there is constant negativity and drama, you can never grow and go beyond your current level. It is not really just about how you see yourself, because most times that is what people see and feed off, so you can then allow and know who to let close based on the signs of you seeing how they would treat you.

I battled with it for years, was it tough yes? Did I have good counsel around me? No not always, or in fact they were there but never really understood. You see the people around you should be able to uplift you and encourage you and if that is not always the case pray over it, because you really need to have people around you who you can grow with not stay at one place with. So all these different elements of self come into play-

-       How do you see yourself?

-       How do others around you see you?

-       Do you know whose and who you are?

-       Do you see yourself in a positive way?

-       Do I know what the word of God says about me?

To name a few.

For now this is where I will leave it short and sweet to encourage and remind someone that they are precious, beautiful, enough and not who people define them to be. Know who you are and there will be no room to allow negativity in your life.

God bless you all

LisaBlessed

EUW SELF LOVE CAMPAIGN- DEPRESSION- THE LOST WOMAN

EUW SELF-LOVE CAMPAIGN – THE LOST WOMAN

Hey lovelies,

So as you all know EUW launched our self-love campaign this January, the aim of this campaign is to do with the importance of self-love, why it is important to invest in yourself and love yourself. With practical steps and tools to do so, in this campaign there will be different people from different walks of life sharing their testimonies, struggles and encouragement to you. More info can be found via our youtube page- I pray you will be blessed by what we share.

So far, we have shared an interview with Coach Kemi on depression and her experience, some stats on depression and other things. Today I want to share with you my experience briefly, with depression and the ways I was able to overcome that dark place.

‘Depression can be defined as a mental condition, characterised by feelings of severe despondency, dejection, guilt, lack of energy, lack of sleep and appetite.’ 

In simple terms to me, I define depression as a low sense of self in all areas, a person who lacks the ability to do things, loses focus, isn’t always present and struggles day to day to live a normal life, but lives in denial thinking everyone is out to get them. I faced depression in younger years, there are two instances I can remember. I will speak mostly of one today, in relation to a guy I really liked and was given the impression that we were going to marry and spend our lives together. Now for those of you who know my testimony, will know what I faced at the hands of this man who claimed to like/love me and respect me.

I think not. I say this- just listing a few things, he cheated several times and would blame me, verbally abused me and bought me down because of my skin complexion- asking why I wasn’t dark like dark skin women, impregnated an older woman and asked me to support the court case etc, travelled abroad and slept with women there when we argued and blamed me each time, lied consistently, made false promises for marriage, would introduce me to ladies he was intimate with behind my back saying they were friends and much more. Until one day he confessed it all. So eventually after a long time coming, I broke down after he got with a woman via social media and put me to the side ended things and chose her.

But then came back to me to keep me as his side chick, still promising all things. I took it all very badly, it was within me for so long that I lost the willpower to speak up and say how I felt to anyone. I was not eating properly, wasn’t sleeping as much and was awake- everyone could see me, but I was just a body moving day to day, but lost in this severe heartbreak and not knowing who I was. I would somehow laugh out with others, but behind closed doors punish myself mentally, cry, not eat, lost weight and all because I had experienced hurt from a man who knew no better causing a depressive episode due to what was endured.

Let me tell you this, when people say it is the hurt leading the hurt, I fully agree with that because he was lost and in a dark place, and had been cheated on in his past so was basically out to get all women to pay for his pain and I went in knowing he was like this, not all of it but stayed. God warned me severally, he would beg me to stay, but I thought no I can change this guy and so it didn’t matter how much it hurt and upset me, I still stayed and inflicted more and more damage on myself as time went on. You might be saying to yourself why not just leave? I got that a lot in the past, but you see when you are young, naive and led astray with falseness you cling onto that and live in a life that isn’t reality. You choose to only focus on the little good, but as time goes on and when reality does hit you, you find yourself lost, shattered, confused and in my case depressed. Depressed, feeling shame, anger, hurt, numb to the world, not knowing myself and who I needed to become.

When one is depressed you may seem okay and well to others, but it is not a one size shoe fits all, it is experienced in different ways, over different things in life. Because depression doesn’t have a colour, face or age etc it can affect anyone, whether due to others, poor decisions etc. We can agree that it leaves one in a state of darkness, constant mind battles, lose of self and more. It is like you are alive, but within you something has gone out and to get back to who you are, to reclaim that back, you need to ignite what was shut down for however long it was.

Depression is a condition that many live in and feel used to it, they are so used to it that if depression were a name they would call themselves that and sign under it to show they have taken ownership of this title and that is the most heart-breaking thing. Many times when we go through things, at times can define ourselves based on what we are passing through. I couldn’t see good in myself and knew no better, so when someone was nice or offered a hand because of what I knew before and experienced, (no fault of theirs), I would try to punish and push away others just so that no one could get close to talk, or help, or to even stick around.

Ladies and to the men too reading this too, at times we may feel as though we know what is best for us, but really we don’t. I thought I knew what was best for me until I got slammed into a dark pit and one that would take me time to recover- that was to allow God to mould me, rebuild, restructure and bring to live again. The woman who was so lost, low and broken and felt there was no way out at all. I had to give it all to God, I couldn’t anymore. You could come with the best options, even God could come there and then and I would find that I even pushed God away many times. Because all I ever knew was to massage the pain and let it linger, because I was never ever fully ready to address it. So, it was self-battles, excuses, hiding and dragging my feet daily just to say I made it through the day but yet still felt so low.

You see on two occasions I have experienced depressive outbursts, one from when I graduated and was so lost going round and round trying to secure a job of what I thought I needed to do, getting good experience but still wasn’t fulfilled. But yet God had other plans I could not see them then. So, day in day out encountered attacks, racism, disrespect, belittling and more from people in the workplaces.

I was fortunate to get, but then it got so much that I had to really get the courage to seek God and thankfully after sometime, was sent a destiny helper to set me on the right path. What I have learnt about God – my number one lesson is that of Jeremiah 29:11 – No matter how bleak it may look God always has a plan and said all things will work together for good – Rom 8:28 that’s to say the good bad and ugly that comes our way, God has us and will do a great work within us. We just have to trust in the process- the obstacles, tricky people, friends ups and downs, family issues, redundancy, you name it- He’s got you.

I could go on and on about depression and tough trials, but I am going as the holy spirit leads to write this, to encourage someone that though you may have had a tough past and many things didn’t always work out in your favour, God is able to do great, exceedingly, abundant things that we ourselves couldn’t even dream or imagine. How awesome is that to know? That our father who created Heaven and Earth can say that to you to encourage you, to say that His ways for us are always better, yes we can ask for things but He goes far and beyond what we ask for with a perfect end result. We just need to trust Him, give Him those pieces, pray, have faith and study His living word the perfect message – the gospel which doesn’t need any extra things added to it. It is powerful alone, it is living truth, no need to add or dilute but take the word as it is in raw form and let God work on you with what you give Him.

Let us pray….

Father in heaven I love you and thank you for this reader, reading this right now, thank you for our lives, the air that we breathe to show us that you are not done with us yet and the beautiful works around us. Lord any areas in our lives that are stagnant, still harbouring past pain, confusion, anger etc right here right now we lay it all at your feet. We pray that you help us to grow, we give you the pieces, we cry out to you and we say Abba Father don’t pass us by we give you all, we seek you more, we love you and ask that you help us in the times of sadness, confusion, or just when life feels to much. Father you have done it before and we know with faith you can do it again. Have your way Lord and may our testimonies live on to show your power. In your precious name we pray. Halleluyah

God bless you, hope this has blessed you and please do feel free to comment, like or share. I know for most of you, one to one talk helps more and as always here if need be.

GOD BLESS

LISABLESSED

JOSHUA 1:9

Dear Father,

Help us to be better in our ways, help us to trust in you even when we feel as though that situation we are in is too difficult, may we stand firm on your promises, love, assurance and our faith in you to see us through. Heavenly Father you are all we need in life, may we be patient in our ways and focused on you to lead us to greater and better. We thank you for being our Father and trust in you in all our ways. So help us Father. Amen

JOSHUA 1:9 ‘Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.’

Whatever you face in life, always be encouraged to know that God has you and has not left you. In Joshua 1:9 there are different points we can take away from it to be encouraged and reminded of God’s hand upon us. No matter how difficult life gets and what is thrown our way we must remember whose we are and all He has promised us. No man is above God and no man can cause you to miss out on all that God has for you.

We must learn to be our best encouragers because even though others can encourage us, it will not always be constant, people can be fickle and so they will encourage you today and tomorrow be the same ones condemning your actions. You should never expect to receive affirmations and encouragement 24/7 from man, it will not happen and keeps one unstable and unsure of self if they do not receive this.

Know the promises of God and recite them to yourselves when you need to pull through a situation mentally and spiritually, alongside prayers. The presence of the Lord is upon us always so it is best to go to Him always and not as second best. We have every reason and right to be strong, bold and courageous because of whose we are.

Let us break this scripture down-

-       ‘Have I not commanded you?’

By asking this Q one can say it could be seen as a rhetorical Q, God was testing and reminding Joshua, for the simple fact that when God commands us we must follow and trust in Him. No matter how difficult situations are around us. We must hold on and know that for Him to command us to do something, has our best interest at heart.

-       ‘Be strong and courageous’ –

To be strong is to ‘have the power to move and carry heavy weights, to fulfil demanding tasks, to perform well, to be a powerful leader, to withstand force, pressure, to not easily be disturbed and upset or affected.’

Notice the powerful definition of someone who is strong, and that someone is all of us, we must be strong willed and able to endure when trials come our way, God is asking us to be strong, because ahead of time He sees what we will face and the determination and requirement it takes to maintain being strong. Under His right hand, we cant be weak and say we are God’s children because His requirement is for us to be strong willed and He will help us to be this, because in our own might we will always fail but with Him we exceed our own abilities and strength.

‘To be courageous is ‘not be deterred by danger or pain, but to be brave.’ To not be prevented or discouraged when danger befalls us, because we have God, we can face all struggles and danger that comes our way. A courageous person does not bow down to danger, but walks through it with the mindset that they will endure and come out untouched because every situation that has a beginning has an ending too.

-       ‘Do not be afraid’

To be afraid is to have the feeling of fear or anxiety, to be frightened and to worry. Firstly, it instructs us in Phil 4:6 ‘Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.’

The bible instructs us to not be anxious but to pray over everything, God knows that as humans we will face things and worry over them, feel anxiety and not cope, so He instructs us to pray, to take away that anxiety, be equipped to handle what comes our way and communicate our worries with Him and not others, to stay focused - on track not distracted by anxieties and fear, that rob us of our joy. As it also says in 2 Tim 1:7 ‘For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power (to do exploits), love (to exude His love to others) and self-control’ to be led in spirit and not in flesh.

When we look at the natural we can get carried away with what we see and if not careful will let that dictate our actions and distance us from God. He is telling us to not allow ourselves to be crippled by fear and what we see in the natural, when the spiritual is yet to manifest the answers to our prayers.

 

-       ‘Do not be discouraged.’

To be discouraged is to lose confidence or enthusiasm, or be disheartened. God is telling us not to be discouraged, we can have good times and feel like everything is great, but that doesn’t mean we wont face bad times and its in those bad times we should not fall into being discouraged, when all things are temporary and doesn’t last forever, don’t allow your joy and peace to be robbed based on temporary situations, that you can pray your way through.

-       ‘For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.’

He finishes of this command reminding and assuring us that He will be with us wherever we go, His hand will never depart from us, He will never leave us nor forsake us. Let us be reminded of this and not act as if we are alone the moment tough times come.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL